When you're young, it's easy to measure how good you are by comparing yourself to the players around you. Who starts every game? Who scores the most goals? Who plays on the highest-level team? Who gets the most recognition from coaches?
When you're surrounded by teammates who are performing well, you might start questioning whether you're good enough, whether you're improving fast enough, or whether you're falling behind.
But here's something we want every young player to understand: Being the best player on your team at 12, 13, or 14 years old does not determine how good you're going to be at 18.
Your development happens over years, not months. Players grow, mature, learn, and improve at different rates. Where you stand compared to your teammates today is not a prediction of where you'll end up in the future. Instead of worrying about whether you're the best player right now, start thinking about what you're doing to become the best player you can be in the years ahead.
Stop Measuring Your Development Against Your Teammates
Comparison is a natural part of being competitive. You want to be successful, earn playing time, receive recognition, and know that your hard work is paying off. There's nothing wrong with wanting those things, but problems arise when you start using other people's success as the primary way you measure your own development.
Maybe a teammate is getting more playing time than you. Maybe someone your age has already moved to a higher-level team. Maybe another player is stronger, faster, or more technically developed. It's easy to look at those differences and assume they mean something about your potential.
But every player is on a different timeline. Some players develop physically earlier, while others take longer. Some have had more opportunities to train or compete at a higher level. Those differences are real, but they don't tell you everything about what a player could become.
Someone else's progress doesn't take away from your ability to improve. You can recognize that a teammate is currently better than you in certain areas without allowing that to determine how you feel about yourself or your future.
What Actually Matters When You're Young?
At 12, 13, or 14 years old, your biggest priority shouldn't be proving that you're the best player on the field. It should be building the foundation that will allow you to become a great player in the future.
This is an important stage of your development. You're learning the technical fundamentals that you'll rely on as the game becomes faster and more demanding. You're beginning to understand the tactical side of soccer, how to make decisions, recognize situations, and understand your role within a team. You're also developing the habits that will influence how you approach training for years to come.
Are you learning how to train with intention? Are you becoming more comfortable using both feet? Are you developing your understanding of the game? Are you willing to receive feedback and work on things that don't come naturally? Are you building the discipline to practice consistently?
Those things might not always earn you recognition on the weekend, but they matter tremendously for your long-term development. Don't become so concerned with being the best player today that you forget to prepare yourself for the player you want to become tomorrow.
Being Surrounded by Better Players Is an Opportunity
We often see young players become discouraged when they're surrounded by teammates who are more developed than they are. They might feel like they're constantly trying to catch up or that they're not standing out enough. We want you to look at that situation differently.
Being surrounded by talented players is an incredible opportunity for your development. When the level of training is high, you're challenged to think faster, make better decisions, execute your skills under more pressure, and compete at a higher intensity. You also have the opportunity to learn from the habits, strengths, and experiences of the players around you.
Instead of becoming frustrated that someone is currently better than you, pay attention to what they do well. What makes them effective? How do they approach training? What can you learn from the way they play? Use their abilities as motivation to challenge yourself rather than as a reason to question your own.
Being surrounded by great players doesn't make you less of a player. It gives you more opportunities to become one.
The Players Who Keep Improving Are the Ones Who Keep Showing Up
There are a lot of things that influence how players develop, and not all of them are within your control. You can't control when you physically mature, how quickly your teammates improve, or every opportunity that comes your way. But you have a tremendous amount of control over how you approach your own development.
Your habits, commitment, consistency, and willingness to learn are going to play an important role in the player you become. You can choose to be intentional at training, consistently work on your weaknesses, ask questions, seek feedback, and challenge yourself to understand the game better.
None of these things require you to already be the best player on your team. A player who is currently ahead of their teammates still has to continue developing, just as a player who is still catching up has every opportunity to build strong habits and improve.
What matters is that you keep showing up and giving yourself the opportunity to get better.
Be Patient With Your Progress, but Committed to the Work
One of the hardest parts of long-term development is accepting that improvement takes time. You see players your age making higher-level teams, getting recognition, or reaching milestones before you, and it's easy to feel like you should be doing the same. But development doesn't work that way.
There will be periods when you improve quickly and others when progress is harder to recognize. You might spend months working on something before it begins to consistently show up in games. That's why patience is so important.
Being patient doesn't mean being comfortable with where you are or waiting around for improvement to happen. It means understanding that the work you're doing today might not produce its biggest results until much further down the road.
Be patient with your progress, but never stop being committed to the work.
Where You Are Today Doesn't Determine Where You'll End Up
Being the strongest, fastest, or most technically advanced player at 13 doesn't guarantee that you'll be the best player at 18. And not being the standout player on your team today doesn't mean you can't become an incredible player in the future.
Instead of constantly asking yourself whether you're better than your teammates, start asking questions that are more productive for your growth. Are you becoming a better player than you were six months ago? Are you building strong habits? Are you learning more about the game? Are you doing the things that will give you the best opportunity to reach your goals? Your job right now isn't to prove that you're the best player on your team. Your job is to keep becoming a better player.
Stay focused on your own development. Surround yourself with players who challenge you. Learn as much as you can, build great habits, and be willing to put in consistent work over the years ahead.
Where you are today doesn't determine where you'll end up. What you do from here matters.
Want to Focus on Your Long-Term Development?
At Gabarra Elite Development, we believe that becoming a great player is a long-term process. Our focus isn't on where a player currently ranks on their team, but on helping them understand what they need to improve and develop the habits, skills, and mentality required to pursue their goals.
Through individualized development plans, weekly mentorship, and consistent accountability, we help players focus on their own progress, take ownership of their development, and continue building toward their long-term goals.
If you're serious about playing college soccer and want a plan and mentors helping you become the best player you can be, apply to work with us inside Gabarra Elite Development.
