Your Guide to Building Relentless Confidence

Welcome back Gabarra Soccer team,

This week we're talking confidence. We’re gonna get real about the psychological side of the game. We have all felt the feeling of getting in our heads, of second guessing every decision we make, of hesitating, of negative self talk, of overthinking, of playing safe, and the list goes on and on and on and on. This is the foundation of performance, yet why is it the hardest thing for players to maintain? Let’s dive into this skill and how to build unshakable confidence.

Confidence isn’t something thats ‘nice to have’, it’s what allows you to recover from mistakes, take risks, and show up with intensity. It doesn’t mean you think you’ll be perfect — it means trusting yourself to compete freely, even when there is doubt. Lack of confidence is normal. There’s about a gazillion things that can create self doubt. But there is good news, you can build confidence. It’s just like strength, speed, or skills — confidence grows through reps, effort, and intentional work. A lot of times situations feels like external sources that are causing low confidence, but the reality is that confidence is built internally. And here’s how we’re going to do it. Together!

1. Speak to yourself like a teammate, not a critic

POSITIVE SELF TALK

Alright, I know what you’re thinking — “obviously” “easier said than done” — and you’re right. This is obvious and it is easier said than done. But the way you speak to yourself is so unbelievably powerful, it’s essential to performance. How often do you make a mistake and think “gosh that was horrible what was I thinking?” Or “I’m not good enough.” Me? All. The. Time.

But here’s the thing, having these thoughts are OK. You are only human. But what you do after the negative thought is what makes all the difference.

Here’s how we’re going to master this:

1. Any time you have a negative thought, stop yourself, and replace with a positive one. And i mean literally say this positive affirmation in your head or out loud. Your body listens to your mind.

   1. I once read in a book (Manifest by Roxie Nafousi) that you only have one thought at a time. Just one. How obvious! But knowing this is compelling. Because after you have the negative thought, you can combat it with a positive one. The more you practice this, the more automatic is becomes. This going to give you motivation to move on and recover quicker.

2. Use short, powerful cues.

   1. Create a simple phrase that will tell your mind — ‘ok i gotta snap out of this’

   2. “I’ve got this” “next play” “I am confident”

3. Write it down — say it out loud

   1. This is going to remind you to catch yourself in negative self talk, train your brain to believe these words and make the habit stronger. Do it every day. Build the muscle.

2. Fake it till you make it

ACT WITH CONFIDENCE UNTIL IT BECOMES REAL

What this does not mean: carry yourself like you’re better than others, pretending to know everything, being boastful and arrogant.

What this does mean: stepping onto the field with enthusiasm, with high energy and belief in yourself.

This is about confidence, not ego. It can change your performance and the way your teammates respect you. It’s about showing up with the belief that “i belong here,” even on days when you may not fully feel that yourself.

Let’s break it down

1. Body language

   1. Before every training session or game, do a quick posture check. Stand tall, shoulders back, chin up—this physical stance sends a message to your brain (and to others) that you’re confident and ready. Even if you’re unsure, controlling your body language is a choice. It will change how you feel internally and how others respond to you.

2. Visualization

   1. Close your eyes and pick a scenario to dive into — winning a tackle, taking a good corner, playing a perfect final pass

   2. Close your eyes and run the moment in your mind — use your senses:

      • What do you see? (Your position, surroundings)

      • What do you hear? (Teammates, crowd, your breath)

      • What do you feel? (Your body in motion, the ball at your feet)

      The more detailed the better—this builds mental reps and makes the real moment feel familiar

3. Finish With a Power Cue

   1. As the visualization ends, say a short phrase to yourself to lock it in.

   2. Ex. ‘I’m ready’ ‘lets do this’ ‘I’m prepared’

Repeat these steps consistently—before games, practices, or even while recovering—and you’ll start to notice a real shift in your confidence, both internally and in how others respond to you.

3. Control the controllable

THIS IS ALL ABOUT YOUR FOCUS

Things you can control:

• Fueling — nutrition + sleep + recovery + mindfulness

• Attitude + effort + decision making + body language

• Communication + focus

Things you can’t control:

• Referee decisions

• Coaches decisions

• Teammates mistakes

• The opponent

• The conditions — weather + the field + the ball

When you consistently show up early with intention, fuel your body properly, and give 100% effort in every drill or play, you build trust in yourself. That discipline creates a mental edge. The more you take ownership of those controllables, the less your confidence depends on external outcomes—and the more consistent your performance becomes, no matter what’s thrown at you.

At the end of the day, confidence isn’t about being perfect or pretending you’ve got it all figured out. It’s about showing up, doing the little things right, and choosing to back yourself—even on the off days. Control what you can, learn from what you can’t, and trust that every rep, mistake, and moment is building something. Keep showing up, keep growing, and your confidence will follow. You’ve got more in you than you think!

Well chat again next week!

Tyler & Talia